Like many people, I got up early today to watch the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton. While I can’t say I’ve followed their relationship through the years, there is something about the pageantry of a royal wedding that I can’t resist. In a world of tsunamis, nuclear reactor meltdowns, devastating tornados and spring floods, it is nice to see something hopeful on a beautiful spring day like we had today.
I remember watching the wedding of Prince William’s parents many years ago and had similar feelings. There is something to be said for tradition and the marriage ceremony was lovely even if the language was a bit archaic. Mostly I could live with it except for the part about pronouncing them “man and wife.” In a wedding both the man and the woman take on new roles as husband and wife and to continue that “man and wife” language reinforces a sexism that is rather appalling. I think the Anglicans need to modernize their prayer book a bit.
On the other hand I thought the Bishop of London’s homily struck just the right note about marriage and the hopes that we all have not only for the young couple married today but for all marriages. I thought his warning about the dangers of giving our human relationships more weight than they can bear was so important: “As the reality of God has faded from so many lives in the West, there has been a corresponding inflation of expectations that personal relations alone will supply meaning and happiness in life.
This is to load our partner with too great a burden. We are all incomplete: we all need the love which is secure, rather than oppressive, we need mutual forgiveness, to thrive.”
The service was full of hymns which allowed the congregation to give voice to their joy. Wouldn’t it be nice if our wedding ceremonies in the US more often used hymns as part of the wedding ceremony?
My heart goes out to these two young people, and especially Prince William whose own life has been marked with so much tragedy. It is not easy bearing the unreal expectations of so many. In a sense we all bear the unreal expectations of others, but for public figures, like the British Royals, it is both a privilege and a cross to bear.
